Superfunkomatic – Observations of the Socially Inept

now don’t get me wrong, i plan on being around for a while. but i’ve been challenged in a class to determine the way, schedule and specifics of how i think i’m going to cash in my chips.

needless to say i do spend a lot of time thinking about, well, time or the lack thereof. balancing what i’d like to do, what i have to do and planning for the occasional sidetrack along the way. the “what i’d like to do” column is always as big as the “what i have to do” column, and unfortunately in a responsible adult’s life we do spend most of our life focusing on what we have to do.

this summer i met a great guy on a motorcycle rally in newport, oregon. nicest guy, middle-aged (by my standards anyway) at 50ish, looked relatively well health-wise, excellent personality, very nice to talk to, and superb motorcycle rider. this was the first and only time i’d met him or would get the chance to meet him.

two weeks after meeting him, he had a motorcycle accident riding with some friends and was killed. there was no explanation for why the accident happened – no excessive speed, no crazy trick riding, not pushing the limits – he just went off the road and seconds later was killed, instantly.

having met him so recently and enjoying his company it had never even occured to me that i may not see him again, or worse still that he’d meet an untimely end only a few weeks after my return home.

i have a tough time with predicting how i’d go – since no one wants to think it’s some freak medical thing, or a heart-attack, or hit by a bus, or something we can’t predict but rather we think it’ll be “the way we wanted to go”. i have a tough time believing that i’ll be able to say – “yep this is the way i’ll die” with so many outside factors involved that are outside of my control.

here are my best guesses:

motorcycling – motorcycling is dangerous, if i had to predict (though not wish) this is a possibility – high risk, low protection – but at least if i did have to go, i’d be doing something fun. it’s a risk-reward sport with many factors outside of the riders control, but it’s something i love doing so the immediate rewards are better than long-term potential risk. having had one catastrophic wipeout already, maybe i’ve gotten this one out of my system.
car accident – other than disease, this is statistically more likely than most other causes of death, and frankly from the tools i’ve observed on the road, it would likely be someone else’s fault

old age – i’m a risk-taker but not to an extreme, i’m in pretty good health and eat well, so i’d hope that my ticker and body would keep going until a ripe old age, but one never knows. i’ve had two friends – one 28 the other 31 just drop dead in their sleep, no cause, nothing on the autopsy, just plain ol’ dead. nothing anyone could predict.

cancer – probably a good bet now adays with chemicals in our water, environment, food and pretty much everything we touch on a daily basis. knowing people that have been i’ll or died that way, it’s nasty – the worst, longest most painful way to be sick or die. hopefully this isn’t on my list of things to do.

as far as details, really just don’t know. seems kinda morbid. if it’s an accident, i’d really prefer not to know, just let it happen and be over with. and if i had the option, i’d hope that no one was there to witness the actual ‘end’. if it’s an enevitability, and it is, it’s just going to happen. all i want is to know that i’ve led a good life, that i’ve had some influence on even one person’s life and that i leave behind some type of legacy (no matter how small) or significant act that people can remember me by.

i’d hope that everyone i knew got together, hoisted a few pints of ale, and had one old bad party to send me off. and the hunter s. thompson – fired from a cannon would be pretty amusing…

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